Dear Aidan, Day 14 (Lalibela, Genna)

Friday, January 4, 2013

Dear Aidan!

I hope you had a fantastic day today!  What did you do?  Did you play with your friends and all the toys?  Take good naps?  I wish I could see you everyday and watch you grow.  Although I’m not with you, I’m very grateful that Dad and I decided to take this trip.  Today has been one of the best days yet!  I know tomorrow will be even better!

As I write about today, I’m sitting out on our hotel’s balcony.  It’s overlooking the valley below and the mountains in the distance.  The sun just set.  There are children next-door playing games and singing/chanting songs.  Below, there is a large family building a fire.  There are also a few sheep “Baaa”ing in the distance.  It’s a perfect setting!

This morning, we woke up and much to our great surprise, we had hot water with high water pressure!  I had the best shower I had had in about 4 days.  I was grateful.  We were ready by around 7AM and ordered a quick breakfast of homemade bread from the hotel’s restaurant for a whopping 3 birr (15 cents).  The bread here is wonderful- it’s almost like French bread, but round- crunchy on the outside and soft on the inside.  We took a shuttle to the airport.  After checking in, we had a second breakfast of eggs, bread and tea.  Our flight was about 30 minutes late, but when it landed, we quickly boarded the plane.  We had a 30-minute flight from Axum to Lalibela, our last stop on our journey.

Our plane landed on a gravel runway!  Upon arrival, we were greeted by the hotel we were staying at.  On January 7^th, Ethiopia celebrates their Christmas- Genna.  This is one of the biggest Christian holidays and Lalibela is one of the best places to partake in this celebration.  We are so lucky we’re here for this event!  The airport is about 25km from the city, and we had a beautiful drive through the country!  The town of Lalibela is around 2,600 meters high around a mountain!

Our hotel is beautiful- it’s overlooking the valley below.  We have a nice, very soft bed, a very clean bathroom and great food!  I’m grateful we were able to find this hotel online as so many hotels were booked because of the holiday!  After we checked in, we met with our tour guide, Addis.  We agreed on the itinerary for the next 3 days.  We were so excited to set off and see the amazing churches this city has to offer.

We began our day around noon and started walking towards the rock-hewn churches.  The churches in this town do not stand tall above the earth like most churches.  Instead, the citizens of Lalibellia dug deep into the ground and carved the churches out of rock.  As such, you only see the top of the church at ground level when you’re walking.  To get into the churches, you must either climb down stairs or go through sloping alleyways carved through the stone.  

These churches were carved about 800-900 years ago and they supposedly took a total of 23 years to complete.  There are 11 churches in total that are carved into the rock and they all have their own story and purpose.  King Lalibela, who was a priest and King of Lalibela, the capital of Ethiopia, wanted to give his people their own Jerusalem.  Well, the real legend states that he was poisoned by his brother and was in a coma.  During his coma, he went on a journey to heaven or Jerusalem (the debate’s still out).  While on his journey, God told him to build the holy city of Jerusalem in Ethiopia.  That way, Ethiopians would not longer have to pilgrimage to Jerusalem for religious events.  The names around Lalibela take after names in Jerusalem!  King Lalibela carved a River Jordan through the rock, and there is a Tomb of Adam and a Calvary mountain!

The local legend states that initially, King Lalibellia started to build his churches high on a nearby mountain, about 12,000 feet high.  He wanted to carve his churches in rock and thought that the mountaintop was the best.  However, right after he started, God told him to “Stop!” and wait for a sign for where to build the churches.  Below, further down the mountain, King Lalibellia saw a ray of light hitting the earth.  The earth was farmland owned by a local woman.  Seeing this as his sign, King Lalibellia purchased the land from the woman for 40 cows.  He didn’t believe thick rock lay below the farmland, but after the soil was removed, rock was found. 

Lalibela was initially called Roha, which was the capital of Ethiopia.  However, after King Lalibela died, the city’s name was changed in honor of the king who created the churches for the people of Ethiopia.  We asked about the name, “Lalibela,” today.  “Lali” in Amharic means “honey” and “bela” means to eat.  It is said that when King Lalibela was a baby, his mother found him surrounded by bees.  She was terrified that the bees would sting her baby son.  But when she looked closer, she found that her son was fine and was actually eating the honey from the bees!  And so, his earned the name, “Honey Eater.”  To this day, Lalibela is famous for its bees and honey, which your Dad loves to eat!  It’s thicker than the honey we’re used to, and it’s not refined or pasteurized.  Some of it actually has specks of honeycomb in it, but it sure is fresh!

How were the churches made?  Western scholars estimate that in order to build these churches, 40,000 people would have been needed and the construction would have spanned more than 23-year years.  The people in the 12^th and 13^th Centuries only used hammers, chisels and curved sharp objects for filing stone to create the churches!  However, Ethiopians believe differently.  When asked, any Ethiopian Christian will say that the churches were built by angels.  They say that building the churches at such speed, and with such craftsmanship and precision, would have been impossible to have been done by humans alone.  God sent his angels to help create the churches, and they added their angelic perfection to them all!

The first set of churches we saw were the northwestern churches.  The first church was HUGE: Bet Medhane Alem.  This church is the largest rock-hewn church in the world, as it is over 33 meters long and 11 meters high!  The top of the church is covered in designs.  However, due to rainwater and damage, UNESCO constructed a large covering over the church to protect it for years to come!  The design of this church may have been a replica of the original St. Mary’s Church of Zion in Axum, where the Arc of the Covenant is rumored to be located.  The outside of the church is supported by 34 large columns, many of which are still standing today.  Inside the church, there are 3 empty graves carved into the stone.  These are made to resemble the graves of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.  In these graves lies a piece of wood.  People in the church will touch the wood believing that it will save them.  There are 3 doors, 1 on each side of the church: 1 for men, 1 for women and 1 for the priests.  Inside the church, each group sits separately in rows marked by arches in the ceiling.  The priests’ row has the highest ceiling.

A very large, 7kg gold Lalibela cross (the cross King Lalibela had) was found in one of the pillars in the church.  This is one of the most holy objects in Ethiopia.  Once weekly, it is taken out of a vault for locals to see.  Foreigners are no longer allowed to see the cross.  Why?  In 1997, the cross was stolen and purchased by a Belgium tourist for about $25,000.00.  The cross has since been returned.  Who would ever return that cross?  Locals say that the Belgium man tried melting the cross into pure gold.  But as the cross came from God, the cross wouldn’t melt like normal gold.  Realizing this, the cross was returned to Ethiopia, even furthering the belief that it is special gold!

The second church we saw was for the Virgin Mary, or St. Mary (“Sainty Mary” in local pronunciation) as she is known in Ethiopia.  Bet Maryam is one of the most popular churches and is believed to be one of the first churches carved.  It is attached to Bet Medhane and access is through a small tunnel carved through the stone.  Outside this church is a 10m deep pool.  This is the fertility well.  Women who couldn’t bear children would “swim” in this well.  But since they couldn’t swim 850 years ago, the husbands would tie their wives to a rope and dunk them 3 times!  This was meant to cure women of infertility.  Dad asked if men ever went in the well for their fertility issues, and we were told, “No!” 

On the outside of the church are carvings that represent Jesus and the 2 criminals he was crucified with.  The criminal to his right went to Hell as he was a sinner and the criminal to his left went to heaven as he asked forgiveness for his sins.  These are depicted in the carvings by up and down arrows.  On the other side is a carving of St. George, the patron saint of Ethiopia, fighting a dragon.  Inside the church, there are beautiful carvings and paintings on the walls.  The walls were wrapped with cotton, and then painted.  Many of these paintings are falling apart, but they’re still beautiful to see!  The paintings and carvings include plants and animals.  Inside the church is a column wrapped in white cloth.  It is said that this column is wrapped in cloth because the column itself was made by God.  The location of the column is the exact location where the ray of light hit that informed King Lalibela where to build his churches.  Local legend is fact in Ethiopia!

Next to this church lie 4 other churches that are much smaller: Bet Meskel, Bet Danaghel, Bet Golgotha, and Bet Mikael and Selassie Chapel.  These churches are all connected through alleyways and carvings.  There are also churches carved an entire level above other churches!  We climbed through elevated tunnels and down staircases!  King Lalibela is believed to have his tomb in Bet Golgotha.  Visiting his tomb is said to ensure your place in heaven!  The model of the Tomb of Adam is located outside of Bet Golgotha as well!  

In between visiting these churches, we ate a local lunch with our guide.  We sat outside and enjoyed traditional fasting food: vegan food.  In 3 days, Ethiopian Orthodox Christians will be able to eat animal products- until then, they “fast.”  In fact, many of the Christians that attend church fast all day, only eating at night!  Our meal was delicious and we enjoyed the injera!   The bill for 3 people, 2 cokes and 1 beer was only 54 birr…$3.00!  Of course, Dad and I left a very large tip!

After lunch, we visited the Lalibela museum.  Here, we saw many historic pieces from King Lalibela and his descendents, including their crowns.  Lalibela was Ethiopia’s capital for almost 300 years, and had 11 kings, 3 of which were also priests (“priest-tis” as pronounced here).  We saw many old bibles written in Ge’ez, as well as holy crosses.  We also saw many objects that belonged to King Haile.

The last church we visited for the day was the Church of St. George, or Bet Giyorgis.  Remember, he’s the patron saint of Ethiopia!  This was the last, and most perfect church that was built in Lalibela!  Without a doubt, it is the most beautiful church your Dad and I have ever seen!  Legend has it that when King Lalibela was almost done with his churches,  St. George arrived unexpectedly to visit on a white horse.  Although he loved the churches, he was annoyed that none of the churches had been named in honor of him.  In an effort to apologize, King Lalibela began to make the most beautiful church of all in honor of St. George.  On the trenched alleyway leading down to the church, there are 3-4 inch wide indents in the wall.  It is said that these are the hoof prints of St. George’s horse, which always remain to remind the city of St. George!  Dad and I actually climbed out of the alleyway on these “hoofprints!”

The Church of St. George is beautiful!  It is in the shape of a cross, and as it was carved with drainage systems, it does not need to be covered.  It is about 15 meters high and has 3 sections.  Each section is designed to represent a part of Noah’s ark: the bottom deck with closed windows for the large animals, the middle deck without windows for the small animals, and the upper deck for Noah’s family with large windows.  The church is also wider at the bottom than it is at the top, which provides stability!  Outside the church in the walls are caves with many dead bodies- some of which are over 500 years old!  They’re almost mummified, but remain there as the followers’ final resting place.  Inside the church is a very large box with 2 large wooden screws on the top keeping it closed.  It is said that because this was King Lalibela’s last church, he decided to leave his box  of tools inside the church, where they remain today!

Around all of the churches are holes carved in the rock.  These were for monks and nuns 800 years ago and are where they lived.  Today, in preparation for Genna, these small holes are occupied by pilgrims who are choosing to live in them for the religious celebration!  It is estimated that close to 60,000 people pilgrimage to Lalibelia for Genna every year.  Many stay with family, others in hotels.  However, the majority live on the roads and in the areas around the church.  They bring food and water.  Some bring blankets and other items to sleep on.  Most sleep on the ground or on plastic tarps.  There is an entire market called the Christmas Market set up for the pilgrims on the hillside.  The market sells everything from animals such as goats and donkeys, to clothes and food.  ALL the pilgrim women wear white dresses with large white scarves covering their heads and shoulders.  ALL the pilgrim men wear large white scarves draped over their shoulders.  Most do not wear shoes, and many do not have shoes!  It is truly a site to see!

After seeing our last church for the day, Dad and I went back to the hotel.  We bought a few souvenirs for our family, and a cute Ethiopia hat for you!  We ordered dinner in the room and enjoyed the sunset on the balcony!  Dad is studying Thai right now and I just finished this letter!

Sweet dreams little one!  I love you more and more everyday!  Watching your videos and looking at your pictures makes me smile while remembering just how perfect and dang cute you are!  I can’t wait to hold you again- only 3 more days!

All my love!

Love,

Mom

Sometimes, It Takes A Village...

In many regions around the world, there is a saying, "It Takes A Village to Raise a Child."  This phrase incorporates family support, community involvement and resource sharing.  We have witnessed this here in Thailand (and other parts of Asia), as well as Africa (especially in Ethiopia).

In the U.S., our lifestyles have slowly removed us from this concept.  Rather than a village, our child-rearing is focused around immediate family and friends, which fits nicely into our crazy, productive, always-moving American ways (I argue that below the surface, we still utilize the power of a village for child-rearing).  For the most part in Thailand, this is how Ron and I raise Aidan- with our immediate family and friends- and how we'll raise our two daughters when they come home.

But, with our daughters, it may require a village...

Ron and I have been truly blessed with stable jobs.  As Ron is in the Army, we are fully supported here in Thailand.  I have been fortunate enough to obtain a part-time job at the U.S. Consulate.  Moving to Thailand, we took a large family pay-cut as I cannot practice as a veterinarian here and had to get creative with what I could do.  Of course, we also decided to adopt 3 children while in Thailand as well...

We were fortunate with Aidan's adoption that we were able to pay for the entirety ourselves.  Although I won't include exact numbers, the final price including travel, adoption fees, foster home fees, guest house fees and post-placement reports teeters around 3/4 of my annual salary here in Thailand.  To do this, we budgeted our money, cancelled our cable, reduced our Internet speed, ate as locally as possible, avoided extravagant travel, and lived as simply as possible.

Then we decided to adopt again.  Before doing so, we completed our family budget for the next 2-years before finally committing to adopting again.  At the time, we had decided to adopt 2 more babies from Ethiopia, and had all the fees accounted for (essentially a year's worth of my earnings in Thailand).  But then we decided to adopt older girls...

For this adoption, the fees, post-placement reports, HomeStudy and guest house expenses are the same.  So we're covered in almost all aspects.  All but one...travel.  Since we are adopting 2 older children, we no longer can fly with them on our lap, as infants, with inexpensive infant tickets.  Instead, we must pay for 2 additional airline tickets- and those tickets must bring our girls from Addis Ababa to Washington D.C to Bangkok: 3/4 of the way around the world.  And unfortunately, these tickets aren't cheap.  $2,500/child - not cheap.

On top of this, we have other expense for the girls' arrival- clothing, furniture/bedding (we can't reuse Aidan's crib for them), and college savings (YIKES).

So what are we going to do?

In this case, we're asking our village- our family and friends- to help us bring our girls home.

We have a 500-piece puzzle of a painted map of Ethiopia (shown below). We are asking family and friends to consider donating $10.00 (or more) to help us bring our girls home FOREVER.  For every $10.00 donated, we will write your name and brief message on the back of a puzzle piece.  Our hope is to have each puzzle piece sponsored- $5,000 raised (the cost of airfare to bring our girls home)- by our village.  The competed puzzle will be hung in our girls' room, where they will be reminded that although Ethiopia and America are rather different- somethings are the same...we utilize the power of family, friendships and community to love and support children.

To most, $10.00 doesn't seem like much.  It's about 3-4 cups of coffee at Starbucks or a lunch out at a local restaurant.  But when $10.00 combines with 499 other $10.00's, that's significant, and great things can be done- like bringing two older orphans home FOREVER.

I wish I could say I was going to be running a marathon to raise this money- but I'm not.
I wish I could say that God called us to adopt and we have our church to support us- but I'm not (and we don't).  Humanity "called" us to adopt...
I wish I could say that I found a second job here in Thailand to cover the fees, but I haven't.

But what I can say is that Ron and I are adopting two of the most amazing, beautiful girls from Ethiopia.  I can say that for the rest of my life, I will spend every waking moment supporting these girls, ensuring they have everything they need, loving them until my heart is ready to burst, and nurturing them to slowly overcome their loss and grief that no human, let alone child, should ever have to experience EVER in life.

Our marathon will begin when our daughters come home.
Our "calling" will continue as we embrace the human spirit and the strength of humanity.
And I will continue to work, wherever and however I can to help provide for my family.

From the bottom of our hearts, Ron and I thank you for being part of our village- our family and friends.
We thank you for helping us bring our daughters home.
And we thank you for being constant reminders that the beauty of humanity can be found everywhere, in everyone we know.

Donations can be made on the PayPal link found in the top right corner of this page.

The Joy of Parenting An Adopted Child

I want to start off by saying that when Ron and I talk about Aidan, we say he's "our son"...."he's our child."  We never refer to Aidan as an adopted child, although we readily acknowledge and embrace that he is adopted.  For the theme of this post, I am recognizing Aidan as that...he is adopted, and he is our beloved son.

Listening to friends and family talk about babies, the conversation of which parent the baby looks like almost always comes up.  When looking at a friend's child, I can't help but notice that the child has my friend's eyes, their dad's nose, and so and so's such and such.  It's what we do.  We find similarities of our friends and family in their children.  Some of my friends take pride that their child is a mini-me of them- identical, except a generation apart.  Other friends wonder where their child's appearance came from, as they don't look like either parent.  Regardless of the similarities or differences, we're always looking for glimpses of others in their children.

Adopted children are different.  Aidan does not share Ron's or my genes.  We do not have the same genotype, let along phenotype.  We are completely and utterly different.  And I LOVE THAT!  When I look at Aidan, I am not looking at glimpses of Ron or I.  I am looking at just Aidan- the unique little individual that he is.  And so much is a mystery that it's fascinating!

Yes, when I look at Aidan, I see his birth mother, my Ethiopian angel.  He has her striking appearance and marble-like, glistening, beyond gorgeous eyes.  I have her image, her smile, her eyes and her gentle presence forever engrained in my heart (and in many pictures and video).  We share the same son, but with different stories and roles as his mother.  I never want to forget (or ignore) that Aidan does share many of the same characteristics as my angel because she deserves that recognition (and so much more).  But when I look at Aidan, there's much I don't know.

And there's joy in that.  Looking at Aidan, I see him for exactly for who he is- as his little, crazy, hilarious, non-stop self.  He's Aidan.  Everyday, I look at him in awe.  Everyday, I watch him in awe.  I always wonder, "Where did he get that look?"  "Who in his biological family had which trait?"  Although I realize we may never know many of my questions, there's beauty in the unknown.  Not knowing makes me appreciate Aidan just the way he is!

Does Aidan do things that remind me of Ron or I?  Absolutely!  I joke that he is Ron's mini-me.  Aidan is at the stage where he worships Ron- everything Ron does, Aidan wants/needs to do, too.  It kills me with extreme cuteness!  Aidan says things that we say.  He looks at things the way we look.  And I know as he gets older, he will act more and more like Ron and I.  And there's beauty in that, too.  There's beauty in sharing your life with a child, bonding to them, and influencing their lives.  So Ron and I will always see ourselves in Aidan.

But when we look at him- really look at him- I don't see me, and I don't see Ron, and I don't see anyone from our extended families.  All I see is the most perfect little person.  I marvel in that!

In adoption, there is so much that is unknown.  There are so many questions, and never enough answers.  Very often, the unknown is the "ugly" side of adoption as the questions burn and the lack of answers ache.  But in this case, the unknown is truly wonderful.  When I look at Aidan, I don't see the known or unknown...I watch him with amazement as I watch moment by moment unfold as I learn more and more about who Aidan, the individual, is.  It's refreshing, astounding and truly incredible- a fantastic way to parent my perfect little person! :)

Questions And (maybe) Some Answers

I've read a number of adoption blogs over the past year, and one of the things I have liked reading the most are "Question and Answer" sections.  I haven't really tried this, but I thought this would be a good time to give it a go- especially at this point of our adoption.  As always, I'll try being open and honest, even it it means discussing sensitive topics.

Now that you have decided on the girls, what's next?
Right now, the girls' files are "put aside" for us while we try to hurry-up and get our paperwork done!  Ron and I have been working on collecting all of the documents needed for our HomeStudy and Dossier.  They are getting notarized and copied (and copies of the copies).  We have our marriage certificate, birth certificates, letters of recommendations, bank statements, financial statements, house deeds, employment letters, medical letters, statement of purpose, letters to the orphanages, family pictures, criminal background checks, etc....

In 2 weeks, our social worker is flying in from Bangkok to finish our HomeStudy interviews.  After that, she'll write our HomeStudy.  Once that is done, we'll turn it into the USCIS office in Bangkok, and wait for their approval.  Luckily, the USCIS in Bangkok was willing to have us complete our fingerprints in June when we turned in our initial application form (I-600A).  IF all goes well, our Dossier may be ready to be mailed to the US the first week in September!  Our fingers are crossed that this will work out!

What about the girls?  Where are they?  What's next for them?
Our girls are currently at their orphanage.  As of now, they haven't been informed we're going to adopt them.  Our agency is going to wait until our paperwork is in Ethiopia to let them know.  As the girls are older and understand adoption, our agency only wants to tell them when they are sure it will work out.  That way, the girls don't have to endure any more than they have already.  Once the girls know about us, then we'll work with other families traveling to Ethiopia to send the girls care packages, letters and recorded messages from us.


How long will it be until you travel to court?
This is a good question, and one we are interested in seeing the actual answer to!  On September 1, Ethiopia and the USCIS are implementing a new system in Ethiopia- the PAIR process.  During this process, the USCIS will do a preliminary investigation of orphan status before a family and child can be submitted to court.  This process will take 8-12 weeks.  Once the PAIR process is complete, we will have a preliminary approval letter from USCIS that will be submitted to court with our case.  This PAIR process adds more time to the adoption process, BUT it will help ensure that adoptions in Ethiopia are ethical and that the children being adopted our TRUE orphans.

Right now, we're hoping for the following (these are VERY conservative estimates- anything faster than this will be a true blessing):
October 1: Dossier in the US
October 15: Dossier in DC for authentication
November 1: Dossier in Ethiopia
November 15: Dossier registered in Ethiopia.  OFFICIALLY paired with the girls
November 30: PAIR process begins
March 1: PAIR process ends, submitted to court
April 1: Birth family/finder court dates
May 1: Our court date (1st trip)
June 1-15: Embassy clearance (2nd trip)- BRING THE GIRLS HOME!

Again, anything less than this will be a blessing.  At this time, we're hoping to have the girls home next summer- about 10 months from now!  WOW- that seems FAR AWAY!


Is it easier to adopt again after you already adopted?
Yes and No.  Here are the reasons:

YES:  We've been through the process once, so we know (kind of) what to expect.  We know what the waiting feels like, the unknown, the mystery, the anxiety, and the hopelessness at times.  We've already have done the paperwork once, we we know what to do.  And some of the paperwork we don't have to redo.  I'm not as emotional this time around as I know what we're getting into and can prepare myself more.  That said, each adoption is different....

NO: We still have to do all of the same paperwork again.  We still have to wait, be patient, and trust.  We still need to travel 2 times and have faith that things will work out in Ethiopia.  My heart is still torn as I have 2 dear daughters on the other side of the world without me right now.  That is NEVER easy!


Does a second adoption cost less?
Unfortunately, No.  As Ron and I finished Aidan's adoption, we have to start all over again.  However, adopting 2 children at once is much more cost efficient than adopting 2 children at different times (a difference of $5,000 rather than $14,000).  Many of the fees we pay cover both children.  However, we are still budgeting our money and saving whatever we can to cover the cost of this adoption.  We are truly blessed in that we both have stable jobs and a life that enables us to cover the cost of the adoption.  We have, and will continue to, make sacrifices.  We don't have cable TV.  We eat locally at inexpensive Thai restaurants ($1.00/meal).  We rarely run the AC (even in Thailand where the average temperature is 85 degrees year round) to save on electricity.  We carpool where we can.  We shop at thrift shops for toys, books and clothes.  And we try not to spend that much on "extra" things.  Over the course of this past year, we have been able to save enough to cover the cost of this adoption, with the help of family as well.  We realize how lucky we are in this category, and will continue to save money where we can for our future adoption expenses, such as travel.

However, as we are adopting 2 older children, we will have extra funding to find.  As our girls aren't infants, we'll have to pay for their plane tickets from Ethiopia to the US, and then to Thailand.  We also have been asked to help pay for our girls' school, and may be paying for their stay at the foster home if they move from the orphanage.  This will be an extra $5,000-$10,000 or so- and is one we may try fundraising for.  Regardless, we'll keep on saving and budgeting!


Are there any funding options available?
YES!  There are amazing grants, interest-free loans, donations and tax-credits available to those who adopt.  With Aidan's adoption, we decided not to apply for any grants as we were blessed to have the resources to fund our adoption, and did not want to take those funds away from a family in need- and thus preventing another child from getting a home.  The same is true for this adoption.  We thoroughly hope that the grants available continue to go to those families in need of financial assistance so that they can adopt a child in need and make ONE LESS orphan in this world!  Applying for grants and receiving that extra money would be a huge help, but we know others need it more than we do, so we're not pursuing that route. 

This year, Congress passed a tax law that made the adoption tax credit permanent.  For families adopting, there is about a $12,000 NON-REFUNDABLE tax credit available that can be claimed for up to 5 years after an adoption is finalized.  Although this isn't a lump-sum of money, over the course of 5-years, will will be able to receive about $36,000 back in taxes for our 3 adoptions, which is very significant.  When all is said and done, the cost we paid upfront for our adoptions will essentially be refunded in taxes, which is AMAZING!  Let me say that again- AMAZING!!!!!!!!!

The U.S. Army also has a benefit for families that adopt.  This credit is reimbursable for up to $2,000/child that is adopted.  Although this doesn't cover much in the adoption world, it is significant to us. This benefit is greatly appreciated and is another hidden perk of the Army.


Speaking of money- what about college and other expenses once they get home?
This is the question Ron and I were most worried about before we decided that we could, in fact, adopt the girls.  In about 7 years, we'll have our first daughter entering college.  In about 10 years, our 2nd will be starting.  That's 7-years to save for college!  YIKES!  Luckily, we're very used to budgeting our money right now, and will continue to do so.  We will start college saving plans for our daughters once they are home, and will invest in these plans monthly.  I will continue to work at least part-time to help cover the cost of college tuition.  Although we won't be able to afford the most expensive private schools, the girls will be able to attend local public universities with most, if not all, of their tuition covered.

As for other expenses- we're working on furnishing their room and purchasing clothes.  We will be shopping at thrift stores and other resale shops.  They'll be attending a school that requires uniforms, so that will save on the cost of clothes for the first year (although they'll still need weekend and after school clothes).  We'll try our best to make the girls feel special and comfortable, but we'll by no means over-do it.

Ron and I realize that by doing this, we won't have a lavish lifestyle.  However, we'll be able to continue to live comfortably.  We don't need fancy cars or crazy houses.  I don't need designer clothes or expensive jewelry.  What we do need, however, is a happy family, and a fulfilled life.  We'll be able to achieve those things- and live richly in that category, by budgeting in other areas!


What about school?  How will they learn English?  What grades will they be in?
Another great question, and another question we had to greatly consider.  This was the most important issue we took into account before deciding on adopting older children.  One of the biggest concerns we had was teaching the girls English.  Although they know some English right now, it's by no means strong enough to be in a mainstream classroom setting.  Through a partnered organization with our adoption agency (Adoption Avenues), our girls will be able to learn more English with Learning Avenues.

Ron and I are extremely lucky right now that we live in Thailand, and that the international schools here excel in ELL (English Language Learning) programs.  Over 50% of the students at some of the international schools attend ELL programs.  The girls will be attending a local school- American Pacific International School, where they will be enrolled in the ELL program.  Once their English is strong enough, they'll be transitioned into a mainstream classroom environment.  We hope that this will occur before we leave Thailand.  There is also an Ethiopian student at APIS, who is in the high school.  Having this student around will be a huge resource for the girls as they learn English and the ways of an American school.

Another benefit is that I know the staff at the school as I worked there for a semester.  I know the guidance counselor and some of the teachers.  I know they'll be a great resource for the girls.  AND, I found a true gem at the school!  The new superintendent's wife works with older orphans and helps them find self-identity while working through their losses and grief.  She will be a huge resource for the girls and I can't wait to learn more about her program, her book, and her story.

Back in the U.S., the girls will continue to receive English language support.  They will also receive academic support.  Although they are in school now, they are most likely behind.  Ron and I will help them as much as we can as we have the time and resources right now to do so.  However, we will be more than willing to utilize tutors and other resources to help the girls catch up academically.  We realize this may take a few years, but we're hoping that they'll be caught up before high school.


What grades will they be in?
We don't really know yet.  We're waiting on final word on their ages, and then we'll wait to re-meet the girls to see.  Although academically, they'll be at a lower grade level than their age, they will be at a much higher level maturity-wise.  In fact, they may be more mature than many high schoolers as they have seen and experienced more things than most young adults in the U.S. have.  We will work to balance their age, academic level, and maturity level to find their best fit.  We want them to have the opportunity to excel both academically and socially.  We will be flexible on this, and will be able to make minor adjustments if needed.


Why aren't you adopting from the U.S.?
A great question!  I want to say that we're not adopting from the U.S...yet.  NO, we don't have any announcements, but adopting from the U.S. is something we have always talked about doing.  And it's definitely something we may do someday.  We realize there are thousands of children in American foster care that need loving homes- many of them older children.  As Americans, we would LOVE to adopt from the U.S.

At this time, it really isn't feasible.  As Ron is stationed overseas with the U.S. Army, we are eligible to adopt domestically from the U.S., although we live abroad.  We have thoroughly looked into adopting American children and I look at AdoptUSkids.org weekly.  Before deciding on adopting from Ethiopia again, we seriously considered domestic adoptions.  We even contacted several case workers in the U.S. about some of the children we found.  However, the children must be "legally free" to be adopted outside of their state, and the case workers we contacted weren't confident in adopting out the children to Americans living overseas for various reasons.  Many of the children need stable transitions, or need/want to be close to biological relatives.  We realized that a domestic adoption wasn't in our cards at this time. 

However, our doors are always "open."  If our time, resources and finances allow, we'll always be open to adopting other children.  We both would love to adopt a child or children domestically- and may do so when we're older and have experience parenting.  You never know though- at this point, anything is possible.  We realize domestic adoptions are very feasible, and very much needed.  We don't want to overshadow domestic adoptions with international adoptions.  But we do realize and firmly believe that every child is deserving of a forever home and family- regardless of where they are born.  Both forms of adoption are incredible options for building a family, and we hope to continue to research and consider both throughout our lives.



There is so much more that I could write, but I think these questions address the majority of the concerns we have been asked so far.  We still have a bit of a process ahead of us, and will try to be patient along the way!  I've been working on the girls' first care package and Ron and I both wrote personal notes to them today that hopefully we can send soon :).  Until then, thank you for reading- and as always, thank you for your support!

If you have questions, please ask away.  We're more than happy to answer them (if we can). 


 

NEVER say NEVER :)

Since we first started dating, Ron and I knew we wanted adoption to be our Plan A to build a family- and by a family, we mean multiple children.  As much as we love and adore Aidan, and as fulfilled we are by being his parents, parts of our hearts are still missing.

Before bringing Aidan home, we knew we would adopt again.  As much as we wanted to adopt from Thailand, the adoption system here in combination with our timeline in Thailand won't allow us to do so.  This was very heartbreaking for us to endure, and we went through a sense of loss through the process, especially knowing and loving many of the kids at the local orphanages in town.  However, after traveling to Ethiopia twice this past year, we realized maybe there are other plans in store.

We truly and utterly fell in love with Ethiopia, its culture, its landscapes and its people.  We couldn't be any more proud that Aidan is from such a wonderful country.   When we left Ethiopia, we had a strong feeling that we would be back...we just didn't know how soon!  In fact, I remember telling Ron and even the Director of Adoption Avenues' Foster Home (Sister) in Ethiopia that we would be back in a year...to adopt TWO girls!  Looking back, this was some insight (this blog post has all sorts of foreshadowing) :)

At first, Ron and I agreed on a year...in 1 year, we would start the adoption process again in Ethiopia.  And then we agreed on 6-months after having Aidan home...

And then we agreed on 3-months after having Aidan home.  For our adoption of Aidan, we have to do post-placement reports at 3, 6 and 12-months of having Aidan home with a social worker.  As we figured we were paying for an American social worker who lives in Bangkok to fly up to Chiang Mai already for the post-placement report, we would go ahead and begin our next HomeStudy for the next adoption- just in case!

During this time, Ron and I talked a lot about what our family would look like. After much discussion, we had decided on adopting 2 more children- a little boy and girl.  We had decided on ages we would request and even names!  Our families were thrilled, and so were we!  We were planning on finishing our HomeStudy in August, sending off our Dossier in September, and hopefully receiving referrals for our two new little ones in December/January, and then finally bringing them home next summer!

Well...

Some things change :)

Back up to January and February when we were in Ethiopia.  During our two trips, we visited Aidan's original orphanage, Biftu Orphanage, 3 times.  During that time,  we played with all the small children.  In fact, we even considered trying to adopt a second baby in Ethiopia during our first trip.  Before going to visit the orphanage the first time, I remember a conversation Ron and I had.  I was crying on the bed at the Adoption Avenues guest house, BEGGING Ron to consider adopting more.  I kept telling him, "What if we fall in love with another child?"  "What if we find our next child today?"  He was trying to be nice, but it was evident that at the time, adopting another child wasn't in our cards...at that time.

While at the orphanage, we met over 60 children that were there- many in need of forever, loving families and homes.  At the time, we were most interested in seeing the babies and the younger kids- and hearing Aidan's story.  However, the older children stole the show!  We brought them lots of fresh fruit to enjoy, and they gave us a personal tour of the orphanage.  They sang and danced for us, and truly touched our hearts.  I remember crying the entire 2 hours we were there I was so moved.

Now, normally I don't make promises out of the blue, and those of you that know me know that I don't make promises I don't keep (I even promised Ron in our wedding vows that we won't have more than 3 dogs AND that I won't be bringing home any farm animals until we actually live on a farm- and I've kept those thus far- and that's saying something : )  ).  That day, the orphanage director asked me to take pictures of the older children and to help her find them homes.  I PROMISED her I would do everything that I could to find homes for those children.  Although that promise was made to the orphanage director, it was a promise to myself- and something began to stir..

When we went back to Biftu Orphanage in February, my promise was beginning to come true!  One of the boys who we had met in January happened to be matched with a family who found his picture on my facebook page!  We met up with him again and saw the utter joy and excitement he had because he knew he had a family waiting.  I don't think I have ever experienced something so touching and meaningful in my life as his expression through his eyes!

During this visit, we had Aidan with us, and one of the older girls wanted to hold Aidan the entire time we were there.  She was absolutely precious in how sweet she was with Aidan, and what a beautiful person she was.  We were so touched that we asked a nanny about her- we were told, "We think she has a family."  We didn't press more at the time.  But we were at least moved to ask.

Again, the orphanage director asked me to take pictures of 3 children still in need of homes.  There was a 2nd girl there (who was also there in January) who had a smile that lit up the room and was as cute as could be.  I'll always remember her smile and joyous grin when I took her picture.  I still remember that smile - things like that make permanent markings on your heart that don't fade much with time.

These two girls made an impact on us.  We knew their faces, we knew their smiles, and we knew their need to be in a forever family.  Looking back, I realized why I couldn't stop crying.  I couldn't understand how children, who are so innocent and beautiful, have experienced so much.  They have lost parents or family members.  They have been abandoned by loved ones, or relinquished by those who can't care for them.  Despite all of this, they still manage to shine with their amazing smiles!  Talk about true diamonds in the rough- glittering and gleaming despite life's most difficult circumstances!

At the time, Ron and I never truly considered adopting older children.  Although we had asked about the girls, I'm not sure we would have/been able to do anything then.  The reason- the timing was off.  At the time, we wanted to experience being parents to a baby.  We wanted to watch Aidan learn and grow.  We wanted to watch him take his first steps, say his first words, experience his first real bath, etc.  These are things that are typical with young, first-time parents.  You want the experience with a baby.  You want young children- so did we.

Since having Aidan at home, we have been touched by the joy of raising a baby.  Aidan can now walk, talk, run, blow bubbles, make crazy funny faces, and do hundreds of other things that light up our days and truly enrich our lives.  Looking at our next adoption, we couldn't wait to have more little ones to triple the amount of happiness in our already happy home!

But then...

About 3 weeks ago, I got distracted at work and for some reason, I started looking at adoption websites with waiting children (children with special needs or older children).  I do this somewhat often, and my search is usually limited to young children.  However, on this particular day, I didn't "filter" my search when looking at www.precious.org.  In looking at the children, my eyes and heart STOPPED....there was a face I knew...a face I had met and loved.  There was one of the girls on this website in need of a family who we had met at Aidan's orphanage!

I instantly called Ron and told him about her.  After explaining the website and the girl, Ron was quiet.  He was QUIET!  There was no, "KELLY, THERE IS NO WAY!"  or, "ABSOLUTELY NOT!" like I'm used to getting from Ron.  He was quiet- thinking- in silence.  He then said, "We'll talk when I get home."  WHAT!?!?!?!  Talk about this?  This was for real- a real possibility!

When we got home and latter put Aidan to bed, I pulled up her picture and showed Ron.  He just looked at her and smiled.  He SMILED!  After a long pause, he said, "Get more information."  I was shocked.  I began an intense inquiry on adopting older children, adopting out of birth order, and adopting girls from Ethiopia.

I e-mailed fellow adoptive parents, I posted on discussion boards, I read blogs, I read journal articles, and I researched what social workers had to say.  Almost every response I found was positive- and a huge relief that this could become a reality.

I then e-mailed our adoption director about her with her picture.  The next morning, I woke up to an e-mail with her information and a statement- "Let us know if you would like to adopt this child."

WOW!  Adopt an 11-year old...at the age of 28....this was getting real...and serious.  I called my Mom and asked, "Am I CRAZY!?!?"  My Mom, being as amazing as she is, replied, "NO!  You're not crazy at all- you're doing something to help others, and there's nothing crazy about that!"  Wow- the reassurance I needed.

Ron and I talked a lot over the next 24 hours.  Where would she go to school?  How would she learn English?  How would our lives be?  What would we need to change?  Can we picture ourselves doing this?  What will our finances be?  How will we pay for college in 7 years?  The list went on and on....but all of our questions had answers and all of our answers made sense.

The next day, I wrote our adoption director an e-mail I never thought I would write at the age of 28...."Ron and I couldn't be more excited to say YES!  We would love nothing more than to be able to adopt XYZ!!!!"  And that was it!  We were doing it!  We ARE doing it!  We hugged and celebrated, laughed and cried (well, I cried).  Four weeks ago, I never imagined adopting an older child at my age- three weeks ago, we decided to do it!

But then something hit...the other girl we met and fell in love with.  I thought, "How can we adopt one and not the other?"  This was something that tore me up inside and I cried myself to sleep for 3 nights with this thought.  "How could we leave another behind?"  I knew (and know) that I can't save the world, and that there will always be children in need of families in my lifetime.  However, I can do something, and I will die trying to do what I can.

I e-mailed our adoption director her picture and the next morning, we had her information.  Ron and I were still on the fence about adopting TWO older children, but we were considering it.  We had more questions, and our adoption agency, Adoption Avenues, was able to provide the missing information.  I remember receiving this e-mail and crying harder than I have ever cried before.  I was so torn and hurt and confused at what society and our world expects children to endure.

That day, I went on a boat cruise with some friends and Aidan while Ron took a test for his admissions into the local university for his scholarship.  While sitting on the boat holding Aidan, I just pictured doing the same thing, but with two older girls next to me.  And then I knew.  In that moment I had, I realized that we could do this.  I realized that our lives would change, but they would change for the better.  I realized that was the reality I had wanted.  I made a decision.  It was solid, concrete and made.  It was not emotional or irrational.  It was an overwhelming feeling I had that this is what we needed to do.

That night, I talked to Ron.  Well, I bawled to Ron.  I explained to him my reasons and what I felt that day.  I essentially said this...

"I would love a baby girl.  I would love to be able to raise a little girl, put bows in her hair, have her wear pretty pink dresses, and play dress up and have tea parties.  I would love all of that.  But I also know that when I'm 90 on my death bed, it's not going to be the dresses and the bows and the tea parties that make me smile- it's going to be the love I have for my daughter and the memories we have made.  It's going to be the person she is and the person I helped her to be.  It won't be the superficial things."

"Looking at these girls, we'll be missing a lot.  IF we adopt them both, we may never have a little girl to play dress-up with or have tea parties.  But that's ok.  When we first talked about adoption, people told us that by adopting children, we would be missing out on the experience of having biological children.  And I agree.  We're missing that experience.  BUT what people fail to realize is the experience we gained instead- we gained the experience of going through an adoption and raising a truly unbelievable boy.  This would be the same.  We would loose so many experiences, but we would gain so many more.  And these experiences would be meaningful."  I cried and cried and cried.  I was overtaken with emotion and resolve to adopt these two girls and to give them a life that they deserved.

After hearing me out, Ron said, "Ok."  He said, "OK!"  I couldn't believe it!  Here was my husband agreeing to adopt 2 older girls- ages 8 and 11 from Ethiopia.  This is the same man who argues with me for AT LEAST 30 minutes on the phone whenever I say I'm bringing an animal home to foster/care for/euthanize/or adopt out.  But this same man just said, "OK" to adopting 2 older girls.  My heart swelled (ok, it's still probably 4-5 times larger than it should be with sheer joy)!

The next day, we wrote a 2nd e-mail to our adoption agency: "We would LOVE nothing more than to adopt BOTH ABC AND XYZ!"  That was it!

Our adoption director wrote us back and said, "Ok, this is fine."  WOW!  THIS IS HAPPENING!

So what's next?!?!?

Well, we have to finish our HomeStudy for this adoption.  Our social worker is flying in from Bangkok in 3 weeks and our HomeStudy will be written a few weeks after that.  We're scrambling to get all of our paperwork together for our Dossier to send to Ethiopia when our Homestudy is done.  And then we wait...we wait for an official referral, orphan status investigation, and then birth family/finder court dates...and then we can travel.  At this point, it' looking like we'll be able to travel for court sometime next spring, and hopefully have our girls home before next summer...HOPEFULLY!

Due to the nature of this adoption, there are some things that can change, and we realize that.  We're keeping the details private and are hoping that things do work out.  Ron and I talked about blogging about this journey, and we decided to still blog as much as we comfortably can.  I always want to be open and honest about adoption in the hopes of inspiring others to open their hearts, homes and families to this amazing process.  Adopting older children is a unique aspect of this journey, and is one we can't wait to experience.  I hope that this blog sheds light on a very special set of children in need of families, and provides experience, knowledge, emotion and humor to the process!

While we wait for OUR GIRLS, we'll be busy!  We have schools to look at, a room to organize, languages to figure out, etc.  But we have some time, which is great.  During this time, we ask for your positive thoughts and prayers.  This will be quite the adjustment for Ron and I, but it is one we truly believe we can handle (and are meant to conquer).  It will be an adjustment and journey for our girls, as well.  For them and for us, your support is truly appreciated!

And yes, I keep pinching myself....this isn't a dream...this is reality...this is OUR life...we're adopting TWO OLDER GIRLS FROM ETHIOPIA!!!!!!  Looks like my promise to get those children homes meant more to me than I initially thought :)

Dear Aidan, Day 13

Thursday, January 3, 2013

Dear Aidan,

What another fantastic day we had!  Dad and I woke up early in Wukro in the Tigray region.  We had slept well in the hotel (despite the bed and lack of sheets) but in the morning, we found we were without water.  As this region is very dry, we assumed that this was very normal.  We were told that the water was, "Out" and that it would be arriving soon.  We assumed this meant that the water was brought in via water trucks- but we're not quite sure!   Regardless, no showers for us this morning!  I knew these posts would make you cringe at my lack of showering :)  We got up and got ready for our day exploring.  We decided to just eat the snacks and bread we had for breakfast rather than try to find something to eat in town.  We were fast to get ready, and at 7AM, our driver was already to go!  We piled into our van and were off!

After about 30 minutes of driving, we arrived at the first church, Abraha Atsbeha.  It was in a very small village and many elders were returning from church.  The morning was brisk but the sky was clear.  Dad and I walked up to the church, which had a stone front and the back of the church was carved into the mountain that lay behind the church.  Just as we were entering the church’s grounds, we saw the priest leave.  We knew that we wouldn’t be able to enter the church as he had the keys, and we didn't feel it was appropriate to chase down a priest!  Oh, the Trouble with Tigray :)  Nonetheless, we enjoyed our time walking around the church and taking in the beautiful valley!  There were many devote Christians around the church praying.  It was so peaceful!  On the way back to the van, we were approached by smiling children.  They loved the chocolate candies we passed out.  Three children disappeared into their houses, only to suddenly reappear holding what looked like rocks in their hands.  Upon closer inspection, we realized they were holding small fossils from the area that they had found.  They were selling them.  Dad and I were expecting the price to be around 100 Birr/fossil.  When we asked, we were told 1 Birr!  We bought 2 fossils from each child for 10 Birr each.  They were thrilled at their sale and Dad was thrilled with his purchases!  We'll put these in your room to show you when you're older- fossils from Ethiopia!  With the history of that land, who knows how old they really are- and what they're fossils of!

We drove for about 30 more minutes to the next church, Abuna Yemata Guh.  We were in a valley and it was very dry- thus, very dusty.  As we approached the next stop, we couldn't actually see the church from the ground.  We knew this would be yet ANOTHER adventure!  This church was built in the 3^rd Century by the first Ethiopian Christians, who became Ethiopian Orthodox saints.  The story behind the church is that, “When Abuna Yemata first turned up here, the local villagers were suspicious of him and tried to chase him away with clubs and spears.  In retaliation, Abuna Yemata turned their weapons into lions and leopards, which promptly ate the attackers.  After that, to show he wasn’t really a bad neighbor, Abuna Yemata brought his attackers back to life and baptized them.  Ten of the resurrected decided to stay with Yemata on the mountain and devote their life to God.  Yemata told them that in order to be successful at this they must never again see the face or hear the voice of a woman.  Instead, they must grow vegetables.  But how did Yemata and his followers actually build the church way up on the mountain?  Well, they didn’t.  Instead, Jesus descended and told them that four giant rocks were currently battling it out to the north for the honor of being Yemata’s church.  The winner then magically appeared in this spot as the completely formed church.”  And that, dear Aidan, is how Abuna Yemata's Church came to be!  Do you believe this story?  How do you think a church could have gotten way up here in the mountains?

Our guidebook stated that there was a 45-minute leisure stroll up to a cliff, and then 2-minutes of sheer-nerves climbing.  I was bracing myself for this adventure- especially for the climbing!  Once we were out of the van, we hired a guide and a scout to help us find the church and climb the cliff.  After our experience yesterday, we realized we couldn't really say "No" to the guide, and realized having a scout for our climb was probably a good idea!  The “stroll” was much more of a hike up a rocky cliff.  It was beautiful in the mountains and the air was cool.  After about 45-minutes of huffing and puffing on a trail, climbing over boulders, and past age-old trees, we neared the top.  Rather than a trail, our route became a sloped cliff.  "OH MAAAAAN!" I thought- "HERE WE GO!"

Our scout was wonderful in holding my hand and I tried being so brave, although I was scared to death of falling.  I kept trying not to look down, but it was hard not too!  We were getting so high and the cliff just kept getting steeper and steeper- and the ledges to stand on kept getting smaller and smaller!  I looked back at your Dad a few times with a look on my face that explained it all.  I couldn't believe we were literally climbing a mountain, in Ethiopia, to see a 3rd Century church!  After about 5-minutes of climbing, we arrived at a ledge.  I thought, “WE MADE IT!”  Only soon to find out that, "Oh NO!" - We had just arrived to the actual cliff to climb.  That meant everything we had just done was the leisurely stroll- not quite what I would have described it as!  

I knew instantly that I couldn’t do it- it was about 60-feet tall and a sheer vertical cliff without ropes.  There were small footholds in the rock, and that's about it.  The guide and scout kept telling me I could do it, and they could help me (or essentially push/pull me up), but I just kept thinking of you and how badly I needed to get back to you...ALIVE! Dad, the scout and guide quickly scaled the cliff barefoot (they were required to remove their shoes).  Watching Dad today made yesterday's cliff at Debre Damo with the ropes look easy, and I was praying like crazy for his and the scout's/guide's safety.  I waited on the ledge with 2 scouts.  During that time, a scout had asked me about some of the clips on Dad's backpack.  His English was poor, but I soon realized that he would like one.  As they only cost about $0.50 in the US, and I'm sure they are at least 10 times more expensive in Ethiopia, I gave him them, and he was thrilled.  This was a reminder that sometimes, the littlest acts of kindness can truly make someone's day, and never to underestimate the power of a small gesture!

About 30 minutes since arriving at the ledge, your Dad came safely back down!  He showed me the pictures and I couldn't believe what I saw!  First of all, the view was STUNNING!  It looked like Dad was on top of the world, with all of the valley of Tigray below him.  What a truly beautiful country this is!  He said the church was literally carved into the mountain at the very of the cliff...there was an extremely small ledge to walk on before walking through an old wooden door and into the church (cave).  Inside, the church was covered in old, traditional Orthodox paintings.  There was a monk inside chanting.  But Dad also said I would have freaked out if I had gone as he had to walk along a narrow ledge around the mountain with a straight drop below!  He was right- I was very glad I stayed safely on my ledge!  It is truly amazing at the great lengths historic Christians went through in order to create these churches.  Again, the guides didn’t use any ropes or wear shoes as a way to trust in their faith.

The way down the mountain went well, and we were able to watch a local family collect water from a well.  As dry as this area was, we were grateful that many development agencies paid money for the people to have access to water.  In this case, the well was provided by USAID and there was plenty of water!  It made Dad and I happy (again) that the United States is doing what it can to help those in dire need in other countries.  

As we walked back to our van, I noticed that he children in this area, as always, were beautiful.   Except in this town, they had funny haircuts!  Almost all of the little girls had mow hawks and the boys had either tuffs of random hair or braided pony tails.  I’m sure you would love it if your Dad and I ever let you style your hair like that!  We tried finding out why their hair was styled in the way it was, but we never truly got an answer.  Regardless- it was quite something to see!

It was around noon and we had just finished seeing our last church.  We were tired from our "leisurely stroll", dirty, dusty and in need of a rest.  We got back in the van once again and began the 3-hour drive back to Axum.  Our driver asked us if we wanted to to take the paved road that we arrived on, or a local dirt road.  Dad elected to take the dirt road so that we didn’t have to backtrack to get to the paved road.  The drive was gorgeous, but the ride was a bit bumpy!  Ok, it was very bumpy!  And dusty!  Well, EXTREMELY dusty!  We had to close the windows whenever a car was approaching because of the dust storm.  During the drive, we crossed many bridges with dried up rivers.  It’s the dry season, but during the wet season, those rivers run wild!  We would have loved to see Tigray in its full glory with the water and greenery!  

When we were about 30km away from Axum, our van began to overheat.  We stopped in front of a village house and the driver called for water for the radiator.  A boy about 10-years of age brought out a yellow container of water (about 3 gallons).  We waited for about 30 minutes for the radiator to cool down before replacing the fluid with water.  During that time, Dad hiked up some of the mountains amongst herds of goats and flocks of sheep, and I played with the young boy and his 2 brothers.  They loved the chocolates and cookies I gave them, and they learned a few English words.  I don’t think they had ever been inside a car before because they were fascinated with it!  When the car was fixed, we thanked them and gave them a tip for their water.  In an area where water was so scarse, it was amazing to see how giving the local people were without question.  Although they didn't have much to give, they gave what they could.  Again, yet another lesson we were reminded of on our journey!  

After having our car fixed, we were off again toward Axum!

Once back in Axum, Dad and I unloaded our dusty suitcases.  I think we had an inch layer of dust on us from the drive as well!  We checked back into our hotel and dropped off our luggage.  Then, we went downstairs for a delicious dinner of spaghetti and steak!  The food here sure is tasty!  After dinner, we went across the street to an Internet café to check our e-mail.  After catching up with everyone back at home, we retired to our room.  Dad studied Thai and I researched our next stop- Lalibela!  We’ll be there for the next 3 days to see the city’s churches and celebrate Genna (Ethiopia’s Christmas).

I hope you’re sleeping well in your little bed as I write this.  I hope you’re warm and comfortable, and maybe even dreaming of your Dad and I!

All my love,

Mom